Updated with comment from Hipster Ariel at the bottom of the post.
Sometimes, you read a post that is so dumb there’s nothing to do but subject it to relentless mockery. Lindy West’s piece on hipster racism is one such artifact. From her assertion that hipsters who go to IHOP are racist to her calling “wide-eyed acoustic covers of hip hop songs” racist to her argument that SWPL-style humor is racist, she’s managed to discover that literally everything white people do or might think about one day doing is totes racist. You are only to make fun of white, male CEOs between the age of 29 and 64. Got it?
This is, how do you say, ah yes: aggressively stupid.
Rebutting such aggression with logic or rhetoric or 2,000 words of text is simply untenable. It won’t get your point across quite so cleanly as simple sarcasm with a dash of hipster irony. So I will reply to her post not with logic but with memes and gifs. Because that’s how I roll. (There’re a fair amount of graphics in this post, so I’m throwing them after the jump. Enjoy!)
First, I just want to show my appreciation for West’s pointing out how terrible white people are. If I ever see her, I plan on giving her one of these:
As to her argument that it’s somehow racist when “privileged people descend for a visit inside the strange, foreign spaces of othered groups. Like, I don’t know, IHOP,” Boromir thinks West has made a keen insight:
Success baby, meanwhile, is pumped that he didn’t do anything silly in his quest for pancakes.
As to the argument that white people ironically using phrases like “thug life” is racist, well, Kanye and his buddy crayfish disagree:
The assertion that “mainly what you end up doing [with SWPL-style sites] is implying that black people don’t like informative radio or TED talks. Stuff White People Like: having the best brains!” mostly just confuses me. I look something like this:
Then there’s this great joke: “ I know you think you’re part of some fresh vanguard in alternative comedy who just discovered that a lot of black ladies don’t like it when you touch their hair, but pleeeeeeease just stick to stuff about how your stupid girlfriend is a bitch.”
Wait, sorry, I was more like this:
Because that joke wasn’t funny at all, you see.
That last face from Zachary Quinto kind of sums up my feelings on the piece. He seems to be thinking “She can’t possibly mean what she’s writing, can she? Wait……she can. And does. Hmmmm.”
Update. Hipster Ariel was furious I didn’t reach out to her for comment; I could tell because of the passive aggressive email she sent saying she didn’t mind that she wasn’t contacted but thought it was “weird.” Anyway, here’s what she had to say: